The Marijuana Chronicles
by The Rev
Summary: The title kind of says it all. Probably the stupidest, most worthless piece of crap I've ever written. But some people seem to like it, so it's still here....
1. Goku and Vegeta

Disclaimer: don't fucking sue me.  
  
A/N: I don't usually do humor, but I had the coolest idea. This story is placed after the end of DBZ. For anyone who bothered to read this, or my other story, Morgoth, thanks.  
  
  
  
The Marijuana Chronicles  
  
by Arda the Vampyre  
  
  
  
"Goku, honey?" ChiChi said in the sweetest voice possible. "Could you do me a favor?"  
  
"What is it ChiChi?" Goku asked, coming into the living room with his mouth full. He had been in the kitchen.  
  
"I need you to mow the lawn for me today."  
  
Goku looked rather confused. "What's that mean, ChiChi?"  
  
She sighed in frustration. "It means I want you to cut the grass shorter! In the front yard, you know? It's getting to high, and I want you to cut it shorter."  
  
"Oh, I get it. I guess I could do that." He said, putting one hand behind his head.  
  
"Good. I'm going shopping with Bulma. I'll be gone all day, so make sure to have the yard done by the time I get home, okay? Bye bye." With that she turned and walked out the door.  
  
"Hmm. I'm hungry again." Goku muttered, walking into the kitchen. "What did she say mowing the lawn was again?"  
  
Later....  
  
"Kakarott?" Vegeta called, walking in through Goku's front door. "Are you here?" he looked all around the living room, but Goku wasn't there. Suddenly he heard behind him,  
  
"Hey, Vegeta!!"  
  
"AHHHHH!!!!" Vegeta jumped in the air, landing on the couch. "Don't sneak up behind me, Kakarott! Now are you ready to spar, or not?"  
  
Goku nodded, then stopped. "Wait, ChiChi said I have to do something called mowing first. Do you know what that is? She told me, but I got hungry and I forgot."  
  
Vegeta growled. "No, baka, I have no idea what 'mowing' is. Just don't do it and say that you'll do it tomorrow. It always works with Bulma."  
  
"Now, Vegeta, that would be dishonest."  
  
"So?"  
  
Goku's face suddemly brightened. "I know! I'll ask Goten! He's up in his room. Mabey he'll know what 'mowing' is!"  
  
Goku ran up the stairs and opened Goten's bedroom door.  
  
"Hey, Goten, do you..." he cut off when he saw Goten was asleep. "Ooops. Sorry." He turned around to leave the room, but something stopped him. He smelled something, well, delicious. He turned his head this way and that, finally pinpointing the smell coming from Goten's top dressr drawer. He opened it.  
  
"Wow. I wonder what he keeps in here that smells so great?"  
  
He hunted around for a few minutes before pulling out a bag of green herbal matter.  
  
(A/N: Remember, saiyajin noses are much more sensitive than human noses.)  
  
"Wow. What is this?" he held the bag to his nose and took a huge whif. It was about the size of his hand. "Yeah, this is it alright. I wonder what it is?" his face brightened. "I know! I'll go ask Veggie!" with that he raced back down the stairs.  
  
"Well, Kakarott?" Vegeta said impatiently. "Did the boy know what you were talking about?"  
  
Goku shook his head. "He was asleep. But look what I found!" he held up the bag for Vegeta's inspection.  
  
The saiyajin no ouji looked at it carefully, smelled it, and even tasted it. Finally he looked back at Goku.  
  
"Baka. This is an earth plant called tobacco. Humans smoke it for it's nice taste. Bulma told me all about it."  
  
"Did you say people smoke this?" Goku asked. Vegeta nodded. Goku looked back at the bag, confused. "What does that mean?"  
  
Vegeta sweatdropped. "It means you put it into a tube called a pipe, then you burn it and inhale the fumes."  
  
"Oh. Well, it does smell good. You want to smoke it, Vegeta?"  
  
"We have no pipe, Kakarott." Vegeta said matter-of-factly.  
  
Goku looked dissapointed, but then his face brightened. "Hey, if Goten had this stuff, I bet he has a pipe too!"  
  
"Vegeta smiled. "For once, Kakarott, you may have had a smart idea. Go back to his room and look around where you found the tobacco, and see if the brat has a pipe as well."  
  
Goku nodded and raced back upstairs to Goten's room, this time careful not to wake him. He had only searched in Goten's drawer for a few minutes before he found a metal tube with what looked like a thimble attached to the side. He took it and raced downstairs.  
  
"Is this it Vegeta?" Goku held out his find.  
  
"Yes, Kakarott, that is a pipe. Now, we must go outside so your bakla of a son isn't awakened by the scent."  
  
"Okay."  
  
The two saiyajin walked outside, and Vegeta packed some of the contents of the bag into the pipe. He used a small ki ball on the end of his finger to ignite the herb.  
  
One hour later....  
  
"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!" Vegeta screamed and fell off the couch. "That purple lizard looks like fleeza, I mean Frieza. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"  
  
"Hehe. Yeah. Except he's..." Goku said rocking with laughter. "He's PURPLE! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" they both rolled on the floor laughing as if this was extremely funny.  
  
"Hey, Veggie, I'm hungry." Goku said sluuredly. (A/N: I just made up that word.)  
  
"Don't call me Veggie." Vegeta said back. "I am the great saiyajin no oowie, I mean ouji. You must call me Fruit." They both fell over again, laughing histerrically.  
  
"But really, I'm hungry."  
  
"Well, go find something to eat, boka, I mean baka." He fell over laughing yet again.  
  
"Okay." Goku got up and stumbled into the kitchen, or at least what he thought was the kitchen. It turned out that he was walking out the front door. He stumbled down the steps, falling into the knee high grass.  
  
"Well, mabey just a salad..."  
  
5:00 pm.....  
  
"Goku!! Wake up!!" Goku opened his eyes to see ChiChi standing over him with a concerned look on her face. "Oh you poor dear. It was so hot today that you must have gotten sunstroke while you were mowing the grass. Poor thing." She helped Goku to his feet, and he stood shakily. He had quite a stomacache.  
  
"What did you say ChiChi?" he said shakily. "Sorry, I don't feel so good."  
  
"I said the yard looks great."  
  
Goku looked around, and the yard was indeed mown to perfection. "Wow. I guess I did do a good job. Funny, I don't remember mowing at all."  
  
"Poor thing." ChiChi said, leading him into the house. "You must have forgotten, after getting sunstroke and all." She led him over to the couch, where he sat down. He looked around himself. No sign of Vegeta. he must have gone home.  
  
"Now I'm going to fix you a big dinner." ChiChi's voice came from the kitchen. "So you just go get cleaned up."  
  
Goku nodded, even though she was in the other room, and got up and walked to the bathroom. He was looking at himself in the mirror when he noticed something funny.  
  
Why did he have grass stains around his mouth?  
  
In Goten's room.....  
  
"Trunks!!!" Goten screamed into the phone. "Baka yarou! What did you do with it?!!"  
  
"What are you talking about?" came Trunks' voice from the other end of the phone.  
  
"You know good and well what I'm talking about!" Goten yelled. "You got into my stash!!"  
  
"What? That's crazy, Goten. I haven't even been at your house all day."  
  
"Oh yeah? Who else would have taken it?"  
  
  
  
  
  
That is the end of the chapter, but not the story. If I get good reviews, I'll write more chapters, involving the rest of the DBZ gang, and their getting intoxicated. If I don't get any reviews, I will curl up into a little ball and cry. You wouldn't want that, now would you?  
  
Ja ne!  
  
-Arda the Vampyre 


	2. Master Roshi, Krillin, Yamucha, and Puar

Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ, never have, never will. If I did, why would I be writing fanfiction?  
  
A/N: This is almost sickening. I had this story up for six hours and I got seven reviews. Meanwhile, I've had 'Morgoth the Demon', the story that actually takes effort, up for weeks, and I've only gotten three reviews. Oh well.  
  
  
  
On the last episode of The Marijuana Chronicles, Goku and Vegeta found a bag of 'tobacco' in Goten's room. After much fanfare and hoo-ha, Goku ate the lawn. Who, in the words of the siyajingirl who was to lazy to log in, will fall victim next to....  
  
Goten's Secret Stash!!!  
  
  
  
"Well, sure boys!" Master Roshi said, "you can stay here!"  
  
"Thanks Master Roshi." Trunks said quietly as he and Goten sat their bags down on the porch. "We just need to stay until our dads aren't mad at us anymore."  
  
"What?" Roshi looked at them. "Why are they mad?"  
  
"Well, it's kind of a long story." Goten said quietly. "See, they found my bag of pot, and to make a long story short, Vegeta insisted that we call him Fruit, and my dad ate all the grass on our front lawn."  
  
"Wow. You boys have had quite a time. There's a spare bedroom upstairs."  
  
Upstairs...  
  
"Wow. I'm sure glad Master Roshi let us stay with him." Trunks said as he spread a futon on the floor.  
  
"Yeah, but I figured if anyone would understand, he would." Goten smiled.  
  
"Well, to celebrate our good fortune..." Trunks grinned evilly.  
  
"Light up!!!" Goten yelled. He produced a fat joint from his pocket.  
  
Downstairs again....  
  
"Master Roshi!!" Krillin yelled as he and Yamucha walked through the door, Puar floating behind them. "Are you home!?"  
  
"Sure, Krillin!" Roshi called, not even looking up from his dirty magazine, "Come on in!"  
  
"Who's bags are those on the front lawn?" Puar questioned. "Do you have visitors?"  
  
"Huh?" the turtle hermit finally glanced away from his magazine. "Oh, yes. Trunks and Goten are staying here for a few days. There fathers are out for their blood, or something."  
  
"Why?" Yamucha asked.  
  
"Oh, something to do with Goku eating grass. You'll have to ask them about it."  
  
"Ah. I think I'll just forget about it."  
  
Upstairs yet again....  
  
"Hey, Trunks." Goten said, pleasantly stoned. "It's too hot in here. Let's open the vent."  
  
"Okay." Trunks agreed. He walked over to the vent, opening it. Neither he nor Goten noticed the smoke filled room began to clear a little, as the smoke seeped into the vent, which coincidentally led downstairs. They lit up their fourth joint...  
  
Downstairs, for the second time...  
  
"Hey, Krillin! Grab me a brewsky out of the fridge!" master Roshi called, still engrossed in pornography.  
  
"Oh, sure." Krillin got up and went to the fridge. He grabbed a beer for each of them, then sat back down, sipping his.  
  
"Hey, what's that smell?" Puar suddenly blurted out.  
  
Yamucha sniffed the air. "I don't know, but it smells kind of good."  
  
"Oh well, just ignore it." Master Roshi said.  
  
Upstairs yet again, fifteen minutes later....  
  
"Hey, uh Goten?" Trunks asked, just as he took a drag from their eighth joint.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Guess what?"  
  
"What?"  
  
Trunks smiled. "I dunno."  
  
"Oh. Cool."  
  
"Hey Trunks." Goten said. "I'm so completely bombed I can't stand up."  
  
Trunks looked at him with confusion. "But, Goten, you are standing up."  
  
"I am?" Goten looked down and he was indeed standing. "Oh no!" he immediately fell over. They both burst out laughing. Suddenly the peace was shattered.  
  
"HELLOOOOOOOOOTRUNKSANDGOTEN!!!!!!!!" master Roshi burst into the room, clad only in green boxers and a purple birthday hat. "LOOK AT THE NEAT OUTFIT I GOT!!!"  
  
The two demis just stared at him like he was a martian. At that second Puar, Yamucha and Krillin ran in behind Roshi. Thankfully they all still had their normal clothes on.  
  
"Hey, master rooshi!" Krillin yelled. "don't forget about us!"  
  
"Yeah!" Yamucha yelled. "Don't forget about us master rushi!"  
  
"He he." Krillin chuckled. "You said his name wrong."  
  
"I did not, you did!" Yamucha yelled, bashing Krillin in the head.  
  
"Hey!" Puar yelled. "That's bad Yamucha! As your best friend, it is my duty to bunish you!" she said. She then changed herself into a huge green penis, and began to hit Yamucha in the head.  
  
"OWWW!" he howled in pain. "Puar! Stop it!!" he ran out of the room, followed by the changed cat. They could all hear SLAP! "Ouch!" SLAP "Ouch!" moving steadily away.  
  
"Wow. I had no idea Puar had it in her." Krillin blinked. Suddenly a look of terror filled his face. "OHMYGODEIGHTEENWANTEDMETOWATCHMARRON!!!" he yelled, blending the words. "Master Roshi! The greatest martial artist of all time! You must protect me!"  
  
Master Roshi shook his head. "Sorry, kiddo, but you need to learn on your own. Her though." He held out a dirty mag. "Take this. If your wife leaves you, at least you'll have something."  
  
"Wow!!" Krillin yelled. He then sat down on the floor and began to look at the magazine with a look of rapture on his face.  
  
"Well, boys!" Roshi turned to Trunks and Goten. "You enjoying your stay at the great Kame House?"  
  
"Uh..." Goten stood speechless.  
  
"Yes!" Trunks burst out. "Very much, but it seems we're going to have to leave."  
  
"Oh, no." Roshi's face fell. "But I made you guys hats..." he pulled out a lampshade and a bucket, both covered with construction paper and streamers.  
  
"Oh, so sorry. But we'll take the hats!" Trunks said.  
  
"You will?"  
  
"Sure! And you can have this!" he said, handing Roshi the half a joint that was still in his hand.  
  
"Yeah." Goten said. "You seem to enjoy it a lot more than we do."  
  
With that the boys took their hats and flew out the window, leaving Roshi looking at the joint in his hand, and Krillin reading his magazine.  
  
Over the ocean...  
  
"Wow, Trunks. That was weird."  
  
"Yeah, I know. Hey, look! There's Tenshinhan and Choutzu training on that island!" Trunks yelled. "Let's go say hi." They flew over and landed next to the sparring warriors.  
  
"Hey, guys!" Choutzu shouted. "You'll never guess what we just saw!"  
  
"What was it?" Trunks asked. "It can't be any weirder than what happened to us."  
  
"It was Yamucha!" Tien said. "He was flying by, and there was this green penis chasing him and hitting him in the head!"  
  
  
  
  
  
Another chapter in the saga of intoxication. I have no clue who I'm gonna do next, so I'll leave it up to you guys! Just review and tell me who you think should fall victim next to Goten and Trunks' secret stash! It doesn't have to make sense, just has to be funny.  
  
Ja ne! (for now)  
  
-Arda the Vampyre 


	3. Dr Gero and the new Androids

Disclaimer: Dragonball Z is owned by Akira Toriyama, not me. did you really think I owned DBZ? Dumbass.  
  
A/N: The third installment of this series about the Z senshi and the ol' happy plant. Don't ask me why Dr. Gero is alive. I said this didn't have to make sense. I didn't get many suggestions about who should be the next victim, so I decided to use my mother's (yes, my mother) idea and use Gero. Enjoy!  
  
  
  
  
  
"Subject appears to be smoking an unidentified herbal matter." The doctor said into the small tape recorder. "I will now go in for a closer look."  
  
Dr. Gero left the bush he was hiding in and crept through the woods toward Goten and Trunks, who were sitting in a field, smoking a joint. When ha came within ten feet, he stopped and hid in another bush.  
  
"Hey, Goten...." Trunks said in a long, drawn out voice, "I am soooo stoned, man."  
  
"Yeah." Goten said. "Me too, Trunks." They both sat back silently on the grass, staring at the clouds.  
  
"Subjects appear to be very calmed by the smoking ritual." Gero said into his recorder very softly. "The herb seems to be a depressant of some sort." The doctor looked at them again. "This must be a powerful herb indeed, for these demi-saiyajin are very calm. Normally, they would be jumping about, sparring or just playing. But today they lie motionless on the grass, not moving at all."  
  
"Hey, Trunks, look at that cloud!"  
  
"Which one?"  
  
"That one right there!" Goten pointed. "It looks like Piccolo!"  
  
Trunks screwed up his face, staring, and then burst out laughing. "It DOES!"  
  
"The two boys seem to be very happy, as if they are experiencing a very pleasant sensation." Gero stared at the boys. "I will now risk contact..." but the doctor never got his chance, as Trunks jumped up suddenly.  
  
"Goten! We have to be home by five, remember! It's almost five thirty now!"  
  
"Oh, no! Let's go, quick!" Goten yelled, and the boys flew off in the blink of an eye.  
  
"Hmph." Gero grunted. "It appears my search has been interrupted. I will have to continue anoth.... hello, what's this?" he looked out into the clearing. "It seems they left some sort of box. Now what can it be?"  
  
He walked into the clearing, over too a small shoe box. He looked over it briefly, then opened it. "It seems to be five rolls of paper. No, wait, they are packed full of the herb that the boys were smoking." He looked at the joints thoughtfully for a minute. "I will take these back to my laboratory where I may study them. This could prove to be a very effective weapon against the saiyajin."  
  
Back at the lab....  
  
Gero looked thoughtfully at the rolls of herb. He had tried every test he could think of, but could come up with nothing but large amounts of a chemical called THC. He knew he had heard the term before, but it wasn't in any of his databases as having any kind of ill effect. He could not figure it out.  
  
"It seems that the herb is a recent discovery that was made after I began construction of the androids. My computer has no data at all on the chemical THC." He looked thoughtfully at the joints for a few seconds.  
  
"I believe," he began after a pause, "that the only way to test the potency of this drug is to use it on myself. I will smoke these paper rolls, and record the effect. I am confident that my android body will overcome any toxins in the herb."  
  
Thirty minutes later....  
  
Dr. Gero sat in a chair, staring at the fluorescent lighting fixture in his lab, as he had been for the past half hour. Slowly he brought the recorder up.  
  
"I feel very strange. My body feels as if it's floating, but still rather heavy. Everything seems to be much more beautiful than it was before. I seem to understand why the saiyajin were so relaxed."  
  
He paused for another long while. Then he looked around his lab at all the spare parts, pieces of the androids, among other machinery.  
  
"I have a wonderful idea. I think I may begin construction of a new android, or maybe even two..."  
  
one month later...  
  
"Yes! It is finished!" Gero yelled in triumph, taking a drag of the synthetic pot his computer had manufactured to his specifications. "My new androids are finished! My greatest work is complete!"  
  
An android sat up off one table. He had a black mustache, and he looked like he was going bald on the top, a little. But it was hidden by a stocking cap. He wore baggy brown pants that were held by suspenders, and a yellow T-shirt.  
  
"Hello android Cheech!" Gero said kindly.  
  
"Hey, man what gives?" Android Cheech said in a thick mexican accent. "Why you got me up on this table, homes?"  
  
"Whoah, hey man..." another android sat up. This one had a matted beard and black hair tied with a bandanna. He wore a vest and a pair of torn jeans. "I kinda got a buzz. Whoa, is that grass, man?" he said, spying the joint in Gero's hand.  
  
"Ah, yes, Android Chong. Welcome to the world. I am your creator, Dr. Gero."  
  
"Hey, this is bogus, homes. Pass the joint, man!" android Cheech yelled at Gero.  
  
"What?" Gero said defensively. "No, this is mine! You must get your own!"  
  
"Hey... Hey, man that's not cool." Android chong said. "Gimme the grass."  
  
"NO! IT'S MINE I SAY!!"  
  
with that, android Chong kicked off Gero's head, and took the joint from his hand.  
  
"Hey, homes, let's get outta here. This is lame." Android Cheech said.  
  
"Yeah, sure thing man." Android Chong answered. They both walked out of the cave, but on the way out, Android Chong stopped to put out his roach on the severed head of Dr. Gero.  
  
  
  
  
  
That's it for this time. Should I continue? I'm trying to decide if I should have Cheech and Chong in any other chapters or not. It would be funny to see how they interact with the z senshi! Send me your comments, your flames, your death threats. If I don't get at least four reviews for this chapter, I probably won't continue. If no one's reading it, why bother?  
  
Ja ne!  
  
-Arda the Vampyre 


	4. Part One of THE DINNER PARTY!

Disclaimer: I stab people.... four or five people everyday....  
  
A/N: I haven't updated in a long ass time. I just didn't have any ideas. But I'm going to try to use all the ideas that people have given me in reviews and e-mail. So, enjoy!  
  
  
  
"This is so stupid." Trunks grumbled as he and Goten shared an after school joint by a lake in the middle of the woods. "I can't believe we have to go to this stupid dinner party."  
  
"I know." Goten rested his head in his left hand as he used the other to skip rocks across the lake. "I'm so aggravated I can't even get buzzed."  
  
Trunks looked at the joint in his hand. "Me either." He tossed it into the lake. "Let's get home."  
  
The boys flew off.  
  
But, unseen by them, there was a junky looking skycar parked nearby. It was lined on the inside all over with blue fur, and the phrase 'love machine' was written on the window.  
  
"Hey, man, those dudes had some smoke, man." Android Cheech said, as he hit off a doobie the size of a roll of silver dollars. "We should see where they went."  
  
Android Chong could not respond, because he was trying to hold in smoke for as long as he could. Seeing his non-response, android Cheech flew off to follow the boys to capsule corp.  
  
Around 9:00 that night......  
  
Bulma's dinner party was in full swing, and all of the z fighters and their families were having a good time. Even Vegeta had been made to have fun. But Trunks and Goten sat on the stairway leading to the second floor, just staring.  
  
"Hey, you two." Marron walked over to them. She was wearing a very low cut dress, but even this did not get the boy's attention. Trunks only said glumly, "Hi, Marron."  
  
"Well, what's wrong?" she said with a concerned look on her face. "You two are usually the life of the party."  
  
"We just don't feel like being here, that's all." Goten said.  
  
"I know what you mean." She replied. "You guys got any smoke?"  
  
Trunks smiled and shook his head. "Of course. Let's go find Bura and Pan and see if they want to come smoke a bowl or two. I got this cool new graffix bong."  
  
Marron smiled and giggled. "Okay!" they all walked over to where Bura and Pan were sitting on a couch, and discreetly beckoned them outside. The girls followed immediately.  
  
"Wow, these are good cookies." Bulma said as she bit into one. "But it seems like the more I eat, the more I want."  
  
"That's the way it is." ChiChi said matter of factly as she bit her own cookie. "You start with one, then before you know it, you're a blimp!" she began to laugh wildly. Bulma joined in, then Goku, then Krillin. Pretty soon they were all cracking up for no reason at all.  
  
"Gee, I only drank one glass of wine, and I already feel a bit tipsy." Bulma said in a slightly slurred voice.  
  
ChiChi suddenly became very engrossed in her cookie, and began picking it apart. "Bulma, you use herbs in your cookies?"  
  
"What?"  
  
ChiChi pointed to the bits of green on the table.  
  
"Those were in my cookie."  
  
"Impossible!" Bulma yelled out. "I make my cookies with traditional ingredients only. Are you trying to ruin my reputation as a makerrr... err... baker?!"  
  
"Don't raise you voice to me, you hussy!" ChiChi yelled out. "I found that plant in my cookie!"  
  
And on and on and on.....  
  
Outside, a vaguely mexican looking man was looking through a window at the party. Next to him, a hippie with a beard and a bandanna around his head was crawling in the grass.  
  
"Hey, man, it looks like the people in there are totally bombed." Android Cheech said. He looked down. "Hey, man, what are you doing, man?"  
  
Android Chong continued to search frantically on the ground. "I lost the cookies."  
  
"The wah?"  
  
"I dumped a whole lid into a batch a cookie dough, and it's gone, man."  
  
  
  
Meanwhile, outside by a tree, Trunks was packing the third bowl of the night. He lit the weed, took a long drag, and passed the bong to Marron, who repeated his gesture. Goten, Pan, and Bura waited for their turn.  
  
"So, where did you guys get this stuff?" Bura said in a slightly slurred voice. "It's really heavy shit."  
  
Trunks coughed out his lungfull of smoke. "Some guy in Satan city named Tony. He assured us that it was the best."  
  
"Well, the weed's almost gone." Marron said after getting a pitifully small bit of smoke from the near empty bowl. "What do we do now?"  
  
Suddenly Pan smiled evilly. "You guys wanna play truth or dare?"  
  
Trunks and Goten gave each other a slow smile.  
  
  
  
"I could bake better than you, any time, any place!" Bulma yelled out.  
  
"Don't make me laugh, tramp!" ChiChi yelled back.  
  
"Tramp, huh? Well, I'm not even going to tell you that you're a frigid bitch who's probably a closet lesbian. I have more maturity than to say those things."  
  
ChiChi's face became red. "There's only one was to settle this. Our husbands!"  
  
Bulma raised an eyebrow.  
  
"They will re-enact the civil war! Whoever's spouse wins is the better woman!"  
  
Bulma smiled. "Agreed. I even have some old costumes in the basement that will be just perfect for the part."  
  
  
  
Mr. Satan was sitting in a tree outside, looking through a pair of binoculars. He was looking through a bedroom window. Inside the bedroom, Yamucha was dancing in front of a mirror. He was wearing fishnet stockings, panties, and a halter top.  
  
"I'm.... too sexy for my bra.... too sexy for my bra...." Yamucha chanted.  
  
"Oooh, slow downn...." Mr. Satan whispered as he shifted for a better view....  
  
And the night went on.......  
  
  
  
This chapter's gonna be in two parts, so don't kill me! The next part will be out in a couple days at most. And I want to add that I have nothing against lesbians, transvestites, or Mr. Satan. Well, maybe Mr. Satan.  
  
Ja ne!  
  
-Arda the Vampyre 


	5. Part Two of the Dinner Party Final Chapt...

Disclaimer: I'm a pretty pony.  
  
  
  
A/N: Well, after not updating this fic for about ten years, I suppose I could give it some attention. I have been taking a bit of time off of my humor fics in favor of more serious stories. But. I find I miss writing about the z senshi stoned, so I will now continue!  
  
PS: Special thanks to Chibi Mirai Gogeta and B-Chan the Psycho Saiyan Sorceress for their constant reviewing of my more serious fics, Morgoth the Demon and The Dark Half. You guys rule!  
  
  
  
Last time on the Marijuana Chronicles, Bulma was hosting a dinner party, the stoner androids accidentally lost their pot cookies, and the z senshi's families and friends are now munching them. Goten, Trunks, Bura, Pan, and Marron are going to play truth or dare, ChiChi and Bulma are going to have their husbands act out the civil war, and Mr. Satan was oogling Yamucha in women's underwear.  
  
"Wow, Vegeta. this tobacco is really good stuff." Goku said.  
  
"Yes, indeed." Vegeta said. He passed a lit pipe to Goku.  
  
"I wonder what our wives are doing now?" Goku said.  
  
"Probably eating."  
  
Goku nodded. Vegeta nodded. Then they both burst out laughing.  
  
"I am beginning to understand why humans like to smoke tobacco so much." Vegeta said, staring at the ceiling. He and Goku were sitting on a couch in the capsule corp.'s rec. room. Everyone else was currently on the other side of the building.  
  
Suddenly Goku shook Vegeta's shoulder. "Hey, Veggie! I think someone just walked past the window!"  
  
Vegeta stood up. "What? Someone would dare disturb my home! I will destroy them!"  
  
Goku opened the window and they both climbed out quietly. Two shadowy figures were standing only a few feet away. The saiyajin jumped and tackled them.  
  
  
  
"Where are those costumes!?" Bulma yelled in exasperation. She and ChiChi were deep into the capsule corp. basement, so far down that even Bulma had only been there once or twice.  
  
"You're just pretending not to find them." ChiChi said. She was going to continue, but she forgot what she had been saying.  
  
"Oh, well. Let's go back upstairs and get some more of those cookies!" Bulma said.  
  
ChiChi nodded. She was feeling very tired....  
  
Bulma held the flashlight (the basement was completely dark) and looked around the immense basement that ran the whole length and width of the building.  
  
"Uhh.... ChiChi?" Bulma said hesitantly.  
  
"Hmmm?" ChiChi sat down on the ground.  
  
"Do you know where we are? Which way did we come from?"  
  
ChiChi shrugged.  
  
Bulma struggled to make herself think. Had they come from the left? Everything seemed kind of blurry.... she couldn't focus her eyes.  
  
"Have a seat." ChiChi said in the middle of a yawn. "The floor feels very soft."  
  
Bulma looked down. "ChiChi, it's concrete." But she sat down anyway.  
  
In a second they were both asleep.  
  
  
  
"Okay, my turn." Marron said in a slurred voice. They had all moved up to Trunks' room. Marron and Goten were sitting against the wall on the bed, Bura and Pan sat on bean bags, and Trunks sat in an easy chair.  
  
"I pick..... Goten!" Marron said. "Truth or dare?"  
  
Goten seemed to think very hard.  
  
"Uhh.... truth!"  
  
"Okay..... umm..." Marron rested her head in her hand and thought. "Uh, do you have a secret crush on Trunks?"  
  
She had hoped he would freak out, but he only shook his head. "Nope. Okay, so it's my turn. I pick.... Trunks!"  
  
Trunks had been staring at the pattern of the carpet, and hearing his name, he jerked his head up. "What?"  
  
"Truth or dare?"  
  
"Dare." Trunks said confidently.  
  
"Okay...." Goten sat in thought. "I dare you too......"  
  
He scratched his head. Then his eyes lit up. "I know! I dare you to go downstairs and tell my mom that Gohan is an idiot!"  
  
Trunks' eyes grew wide. "She'll kill me, Goten!"  
  
Goten smiled. "I know."  
  
Trunks reluctantly got up and began to walk downstairs. The others followed him.  
  
When he got to the room that everyone was in, they saw something very funny...  
  
Krillin was on the table with android Eighteen. They were both stark naked except for towels around their waists and heads. They were doing the lambada.  
  
"Oh my KAMI!!!" Marron yelled out and bolted back up the stairs. The others followed a second later. They went into Trunks' room and locked the door.  
  
"Did I...." Goten gulped as they all sat beck down in their former positions, "Did I just see.... what I think I saw?"  
  
Pan nodded.  
  
Trunks snickered.  
  
"What's so funny?!" Marron yelled.  
  
"I saw your mom's boobs." Trunks laughed.  
  
Marron scowled at him. "Oh, shut up."  
  
Goten shook his head back and forth. "All that excitement has just killed my buzz." He said. "Got any spare weed, Trunks?"  
  
Trunks smiled. "Right in the ol' secret spot!" he said, reaching under his matress. He produced a bag about the size of a pack of cigarettes. "Just enough to get us all high again!"  
  
from under his bed, he pulled the bong they ha been using earlier. It was about a foot high and had two chambers. It was a clear green, and said 'The Monster' on the side.  
  
"The Monster!!" Goten yelled out, slapping Trunks a high five.  
  
"Just the right bong for the occasion." Trunks said. He looked around his room and found a bottle of Mt. Dew on the desk. He poured some into the first chamber, then the second chamber. He packed the bowl and lit up.  
  
Soon sickly sweet smoke filled the room and began to drift down the hallway.  
  
  
  
"Hey, man, what gives!!!" android Cheech screamed as Vegeta tackled him.  
  
"Really, man. You shouldn't sneak up on people." Android Chong said. Goku and Vegeta let them go and stood up.  
  
"Hey, man, we wasn't trying to cause no trouble or nothin." Android Chong said. "We just wanted to find our cookies we lost earlier. Hey man, is that grass!?" he said, pointing to the joint in Goku's hand.  
  
Goku shook his head. "It's tobacco."  
  
Chong knew what he smelled, however. "Can I have a hit, man?"  
  
Goku shrugged and handed the joint to Chong.  
  
  
  
  
  
This story is getting more and more pointless as it goes on, so let's just skip to the next morning...  
  
Trunks woke up in bed with Pan.  
  
Goten woke up in bed with Marron.  
  
Bura woke up in bed with Bingo, Krillin's dog.  
  
ChiChi and Bulma woke up in the basement.  
  
Krillin and Eighteen woke up in jail.  
  
Gohan and Videl woke up in a Dillards department store.  
  
Goku and Vegeta stayed up all night smoking 'tobacco' with androids Cheech and Chong.  
  
And Yamucha woke up with Mr. Satan.  
  
================================ O ============================  
  
That will be the last chapter of this story, barring miracles. I have completely run out of inspiration for this storyline. I may make more in the future, but I really doubt it. Thanks to everyone who reviewed!  
  
Ja ne!  
  
Arda the Vampyre 


End file.
